I’m at my wits end with the constant bullying from my aggressive partner

DEAR DEIDRE: AFTER years of dealing with constant bullying from my aggressive partner, I’m at my wits end. 

No matter what, in her eyes I can never do anything right, and I’ve had enough. 

I’m 65, she’s 60, and we’ve been together for fifteen years.

At first, our relationship was full of love. We’d found solace in each other after the end of both of our marriages. 

However, over the years she’s grown cold, and as her mental health has deteriorated, so has our relationship. 

Now she spends every day picking at me, and almost every conversation we have ends up in a screaming match.

All I ever do is try to please her, but it’s almost as if she finds joy in berating me and leaving me frightened. Just last week, she said if I didn’t listen to her, she would get her brother to 'sort me out’. 

To make matters worse, she’s also changed all of the bills into her name, so I have no control over any of our finances.

I feel so stuck in this relationship, but I fear there’s no escape. 

Please help.

DEIDRE SAYS: Your relationship sounds abusive, and it’s clear your wife is making your life miserable. 

While you may feel like there’s no escape, there’s always a way out. 

My support pack, Abusive Partner, explains more and contains details of organisations that can help you leave if that’s what you want to do.

Seek support from friends or family too, so that they know what’s going on and can be there for you.