My sister’s greedy husband wants £70 Christmas present for kids – and we don’t have any

DEAR DEIDRE: I CAN’T stand my sister’s husband and his money- grabbing ways.

My parents wouldn’t publicly criticise, but even they were visibly upset by his latest trick.

I’m 28, my husband is 30 and my sister is three years older than me.

We have all been invited to theirs for Christmas – which is a first.

Initially, I was looking forward to it, then my mum said my brother-in-law had asked for £45 from each of us towards the cost.

Then another message came through that they didn’t want any gifts to be exchanged for the adults and the only gifts should be for the children.

They then suggested a spend of between £60-£70 per child.

My husband and I don’t have any children but they have two daughters!

So it’s looking like it’s going to be a really expensive one.

It would be cheaper to go to a hotel or restaurant, then at least I wouldn’t have to spend the day with my miserly brother-in-law.

Mum is so upset and I don’t even want to go any more.

The total bill for me and my husband to eat some of their overcooked turkey will be roughly £230!

We don’t have that kind of money and even if we did, his demands would still turn my stomach.

How do I talk to my sister about how out of order her husband’s demands are?

DEIDRE SAYS: I’d recommend talking to your sister and let her know that you are really keen to contribute and feel it would be better to bring along the Christmas cake, or pudding or wine, for example.

Try to make it a conversation to avoid conflict. You can also suggest a different present guide at the same time.

If you can’t come to an agreement that everyone is happy with, then it may be best to thank them for their invitation, while explaining you won’t be able to go ahead with a Christmas that you can’t afford.

The day shouldn’t be dictated by one person and my support pack Standing Up For Yourself will help you put your point of view across while also avoiding a fallout.