Weight loss: I lost 11st but wish I was still fat because I despise looking at my saggy skin in the mirror
MOST people would think losing a staggering 11 stone in weight would transform a slimmer's confidence and make them happier than ever.
But for Victoria Harries her dramatic weight loss has been devastating - and has left her more "self-conscious" than ever.
This is because the account manager, 34, has been left with a stone-and-a-half of excess skin hanging from her tummy.
And Victoria, from Cheltenham, Gloucestershire, finds it so unbearable looking at her sagging skin, that she even wishes she was still fat.
Victoria says: "When I was big I was very outgoing, I was always loud and sociable, the life and soul of the party.
"Now I won't even go to the party."
Victoria first decided to lose weight in 2012 after she realised she had ballooned to over 22 stone.
She printed off a photo of herself at her heaviest and stuck it to the door of her fridge to motivate her - and began a series of diets and started a rigorous gym regime.
And, before long, Victoria quickly saw the pounds drop off.
Victoria said: "I think I always subconsciously knew that my weight was a problem. I hid from everything, I never went out.
"Then, I went to a friend's wedding and had a photo taken by the photographer.
"When I eventually saw the photo I was ashamed and embarrassed about how I'd let this happen to myself.
"I untagged myself but printed the picture off and stuck it to my fridge. That was the source of all my motivation.
"I tried various different things but found that a calorie deficit worked best for me.
"Lots of things worked but I just needed something that was sustainable and worked well if I relapsed a bit and needed to get back on again.
I've changed my life but feel like I've made it worse. I had more confidence when I was bigger than I do now
Victoria Harries
"I did 10,00 steps each day before 10am and ate a balanced diet. Losing weight is all about gradual lifestyle changes.
"It was really difficult losing the weight at first. It's physically and mentally challenging especially when you've been that big.
"I was constantly having to change what I was doing as my body would just get used to it and my weight would just plateau."
After months dedicated to losing weight, Victoria soon stepped on the scales and realised she had lost a whopping 11 stone.
However, the weight loss was tainted with difficulty as she was left with a stone-and-a-half of excess skin.
And rather than boosting her self-esteem, her weight loss stripped her of any confidence she had - especially as people kept asking if she was pregnant.
Victoria said: "I've changed my life but feel like I've made it worse. I had more confidence when I was bigger than I do now.
"It's really frustrating as I've put seven years of effort into it and feel like I haven't really accomplished anything.
"I still can't wear the clothes I want to. When I was bigger I dreamed of going into top shop and buying a pair of jeans and I still can't do that now.
"I hate myself, I can't even look at myself in the mirror."
On top of this, the excess saggy skin she's been left with on her arms, legs and stomach causes Victoria a lot of discomfort and she gets a lot of bad infections.
I hate myself, I can't even look at myself in the mirror
Victoria Harries
She added: "I get a lot chafing and irritation, I get really bad sores and a lot of infections.
"I go to the gym six times a week and can hear my skin bouncing.
"I can feel it and hear it and it makes me feel sick sometimes.
"When I'm in bed every-time I move or turn over the skin moves over and flops. Nothing fits, everything is either too tight or baggy.
"The only clothes that feel nice are baggy clothes but obviously they're not flattering.
"I'm always asked if I'm pregnant, it's obviously quite an awkward conversation to have.
"I was out walking the dog last week and someone came over to me and asked when I was due.
"I hate myself and the way I look, I won't look at myself in the mirror.
"Often, I won't even go the hairdresser so I don't have to look at myself in the mirror.
"The gym is my escape, that's about it."
More on diet and weight loss
Victoria Harries, 34, is now trying to raise £9,500 for an operation to remove her excess skin so she can finally have the body of her dreams.
She said: "It will change my life and give me the change I hoped I was going to have by losing the weight."
You can donate to Victoria's GoFundMe .
