I share a bed with my kids to guarantee a decent night’s kip – my hubby sleeps on the floor and we have sex in the loo

AT the end of a busy day Aimee Bradley climbs into a comfy double bed.

Sadly for husband Davin, she doesn’t share with him but another male in her life, six-month-old Blake.

Aimee is one of a rising number of parents co-sleeping with their young children and did the same thing for at least the first year of nine-year-old daughter Autumn and three-year-old Ashton’s lives.

Davin sleeps on a mattress on son Ashton’s bedroom floor.

And what of Aimee and Davin’s sex life?

A quickie in the downstairs loo is about all they manage these days.

After Autumn was born there was no sex for a year.

The couple are sharing their story, a tale that will sound all too familiar for millions of parents, after actress Helen Flanagan revealed she had not slept in the same bed as fiancé Scott Sinclair since eldest child Matilda, six, was born as she has since been co-sleeping with Matilda, then Delilah, three, now Charlie, one.

The Corrie favourite, who has been engaged to footballer Scott since 2018, said the couple are more like “flatmates”, adding: “I’ve always just co-slept with the kids out of easiness . . . ”

Aimee can relate to it but says that sharing her bed with the kids instead of her husband comes at a cost — her relationship with Davin.

“I co-slept with all my children for at least a year. With Ashton it was pretty much until Blake was born, so he was two and a half,” says the stay-at-home mum from Havant, Hampshire.

“With Blake, I fell into it as it’s the easiest way for me and him to get a decent sleep. I breastfeed him so I don’t have to get up and I also love the cuddles.

“But it comes at a price — and that’s my husband’s happiness. We have very little alone time and he’s fed up.

“I feel guilty, but babies grow up quickly and this time is a tiny chunk out of what will be a long marriage.

“We only manage to have sex by snatching a few moments in the kitchen or the downstairs loo.

“Up until a few weeks ago it was at least spontaneous, which spiced it up.

"But then Autumn walked in on us having sex on the sofa — I was mortified.

"Now, if we’re in the mood for sex, we put a laundry basket at the top and bottom of the stairs so we hear them move if Autumn comes down the stairs.

“There’s no spontaneity and I worry about getting caught.

“Other times we wait until Davin has a day off during the week and Autumn is at school. There’s no time for an emotional connection, it’s ticking a box.

"Davin will say, ‘this (co-sleeping) has got to stop’, but I’ll do whatever it takes to have a contented baby who sleeps. Although I hate Davin being miserable, I’ll carry on co-sleeping.”

Davin, 38, an electrical engineer, says: “We didn’t have sex for a year after having Autumn. Adapting to having a baby took its toll on our relationship and we ended up going for counselling.

Autumn walked in on us having sex on the sofa — I was mortified.

Aimee Bradley

“And now I feel pushed out and long to have a good night’s sleep with my wife. I understand Aimee’s reasons why she co-sleeps — this way we all manage to get some sleep — but I’m hoping it doesn’t go on for much longer.”

Expert nanny Kathryn Mewes says Davin’s feelings are not unusual.

The mum of two, presenter of cable TV’s The Three Day Nanny, says: “I’m not saying couples must have sex every night to have a healthy relationship.

“Neither am I suggesting that mums who co-sleep at some point during their child’s life should be riddled with guilt.

“But when a partner doesn’t feel welcome in their own bedroom, they can stop feeling welcome in the relationship altogether. And who benefits from the arrangement anyway? You or your child?”

A survey of 8,500 parents by the Lullaby Trust found that 76 per cent have co-slept with their baby.

The NHS advises that the safest place for your baby to sleep for the first six months is in a cot in your room, and it highlights the association between sudden infant death syndrome and co-sleeping.

It’s important not to share a bed with your baby if you or your partner smoke, have recently drunk alcohol, or have taken medicine or drugs that make you sleep more heavily.

Co-sleeping risks are increased if your baby was premature or was born weighing less than 5½lb.

Mum of three Amelia Walker says “musical beds” began with her middle child Antonia, who is five.

Her eldest, Aria, now seven, was a “good” sleeper but 13-month-old Enzo also co-sleeps with Mum.

Husband Hez, 40, who works in finance, sleeps on a pullout bed.

I’ve always just co-slept with the kids out of easiness . . .

Helen Flanagan

Amelia, 38, who also works in finance, says: “Aria was a good sleeper and transitioned to her cot within a few weeks so Hez never felt pushed out.

“Our second daughter took hours to settle. She’d often end up in our bed and disrupt our sleep, and we’d end up playing musical beds.

“Hez was concerned about having a third because of the disruption but I swore that I’d be more disciplined about putting Enzo in his cot.

“But from day one he’s been in bed with me, while Hez has been on a pullout bed in the girls’ room. Inevitably it’s had an impact on our marriage and it’s galling for him.

“We’re tired with three children and our jobs, and miss the intimacy of sleeping together. Sex is less frequent, but also the closeness of waking up together.

“But I relish the cuddles with Enzo. He’ll be our last child and I want to savour every moment.”

Hez says: “It’s very hard for fathers these days. You’re expected to be the breadwinner, do DIY, help with all the housework and then you can’t even sleep in your own bed.

“I feel taken for granted. I go out to work and then I’m just the person that sleeps on the floor. I envy Amelia because she gets to sleep in the king-size bed.”

Three Day Nanny’s Kathryn says it is important that Dad’s feelings are not dismissed.

“There are times when we have to simply stop being Mum and start being a wife or partner,” she says.

“The moment a woman holds a new baby in her arms, a partner inevitably feels pushed out.

"Then co-sleeping happens and he begins to question why all the love went to the baby. So much so, he even lost his mattress. For co-sleeping to ever work, everyone in the bed must be in agreement.”

Getting back into the marital bed is lovely, it’s like the good old days. I’m certainly not moving out again in a rush.

Hez Walker

But Sarah Ockwell-Smith, author of The Gentle Sleep Book, says: “If a mother and child co-sleep it’s generally because that baby has a need to be close to their mum and the mum feels an innate need in her body to be close to her baby at night.

“There are many benefits too, when done within the safety guidelines, such as helping increase milk supply and keeping the baby’s breathing regulated.

“People talk about compromise, but why should Mum and baby compromise for Dad’s needs? It’s very selfish for Dad to say, ‘I want my bed back’. If a partner is worried about sex then they need to think about other places and times to do it.”

Amelia and Hez, of South West London, have actually sought help from a sleep expert in the past few weeks, after Amelia’s mum gently pointed out that the arrangement was unfair on Hez.