I’m a child behaviour expert & this is why you should never tell your little one to ‘use their words’- say this instead

WHEN A child is kicking off, parents will say anything to calm them down and understand what the problem is.

Plenty of mums and dads will ask their little one to “use their words” during a melt-down to get them to communicate the problem.

But according to the experts this is not the best response to a screaming fit.

Mum Rachel Bowie, writing for , suggested that this is because they don’t have the capacity to reason their emotions at the young age.

She said: “Toddlers and preschoolers are still learning how to process events, feelings and words all at once.

“‘Use your words’ sets an unrealistic expectation that they absolutely cannot meet.”

The professionals at , have an alternative approach that may be more effective.

They suggest you say: “I see you’re upset. What happened?”

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Next up they say you should be curious and try to describe the situation in a way that helps them to work out their own feelings about the situation.

This will help to empower them to actually communicate better when they feel themselves getting emotional.

Helping them process in this way means that they will learn the write vocabulary to express themselves.

But don’t get too frustrated, if we’re honest with ourselves, using the right language to express how we’re feeling is tough… at any age.