I’m a proud cougar – I only date men 10 years younger than me, people might think it’s ‘inappropriate’ but I don’t care
A WOMAN has revealed she’s proud to be a cougar and prefers dating men at least ten years younger than her despite what people may say.
Carla, 41, is currently dating her partner, BB*, who is 28 and argues she shouldn’t be made to feel ashamed for her decision.
The self-proclaimed cougar explained she realised just how important it was for her to date younger men after her marriage broke down.
The London-based designer turned to the dating app Tinder and began to slowly lower her age preference.
She was amazed when men in their twenties started lining up to take her on dates so they could fulfill their ‘cougar fantasies.’
While she admits she doesn't have a type she told the : I've learnt that 25-30 is definitely my sweet spot.
"Younger than that and our lifestyles and maturity are too different to have a real connection. Older than that and guys are usually looking for a wife."
Not only does she get to date younger men but she’s also turned her sex-positive lifestyle into a side hustle.
She said: “Being a cougar is both my passion and side hustle,"
"For years it wasn't deliberate.
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"In my late twenties and early thirties, I was living abroad and just ended up hanging out with younger people. They were more fun and open-minded, and I was drawn to that."
One of the men she dated and went on to marry was six younger, but they separated five years later in 2019.
Carla found the breakup difficult and wasn’t feeling great about herself, so a year later decided to try out the dating app.
She added: “On Tinder you choose your preferences – location, gender and age. I remember starting with my own, which was 38, and gradually pushing it lower and lower."
"Suddenly all these younger guys were swiping on me. I couldn't believe it, I just thought 'are you serious?'”
"After my separation, I felt washed-up, that nobody was going to want me. Now here were these young guys who clearly did. It felt good!"
At first, Carla was concerned men wouldn’t see the ‘real her’ and think she was a catfish.
But her anxiety was pushed aside when she went on her first date - who showered her with compliments.
In the two years since, Carla said she’s had great experiences with younger people - dating four at once and even being part of a throuple with a man and a woman.
Getting back on the dating scene helped Carla rediscover her sexuality and boost her confidence.
And dating guys younger often has its pros as Carla explains they tend to be more open-minded.
Carla added: “I don't want children and I've realised monogamy isn't for me, which can be challenging when dating people my age or older."
Now Carla, who shares her journey on , has refound her sexuality she has also managed to make money from it by having an OnlyFans account, an affiliate for sex toy companies and sells cougar dating guides, helping young guys attract older women.
Despite Carla’s newfound confidence, trolls on TikTok constantly leave nasty comments she no longer bothers reading.
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She added: "Now I'm passionate about sex, kink and pleasure positivity. I just want to normalise being more open about our desires.
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"There are so many ideas about what women are supposed to do and not do, especially once you're over a certain age. But why should we just disappear into a corner quietly once we're over 35? We deserve pleasure too."
*BB is not her boyfriend's real name.
