I’m sick of c-section shame & being labelled snobby and posh but I didn’t crave the ‘natural’ birth ‘badge of honour’
ELECTIVE caesarean sections have hit a record high and women are having them not only for medical reasons but by choice.
One in four babies (25 per cent) born in NHS hospitals in England last year were delivered by caesarean section, compared to 23 per cent the year previously - and 13 per cent a decade ago.
Here, mum-of-one Caroline Bragg, 38, a personal trainer who lives in Kingston-upon-Thames, south west London, explains why she opted for a surgical delivery despite the pressure to go ‘natural’ – and why she refuses to be shamed for it…
THE postnatal yoga teacher pulled a sympathetic expression and I braced myself for what was coming next.
“I’m so sorry you had a c-section,” she said, seriously. “How difficult for you.”
“Don’t be,” I replied breezily. “That was the birth I chose to have.”
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In fact, my elective caesarean in October 2020 was my dream delivery – and how many women can say that?
I feel fortunate to have given birth to my son Fox, now four, in a calm, stress-free setting, with classical music playing and my husband Tom, 48, holding my hand.
Both of us emerged healthy and safe – yet to reveal I picked a c-section over attempting a vaginal birth is often looked down on or met with pitying words.
Even my dad, an old-school London black cab driver, said to me: “Are you too posh to push?”
I’m most certainly not – I’m simply a woman trying to make the best decision for her body and her baby.
Why is standing up for your own health derided as snobby or posh?
The cut is usually made across your stomach, just below the bikini line.
A caesarean is a major operation and it carries a number of risks, so it's usually only done if it's the safest option for you and your baby.
Planned caesareans are usually done from the 39th week of pregnancy.
A caesarean may be recommended as a planned (elective) procedure or done in an emergency if it's thought a vaginal birth is too risky.
Some women choose to have a caesarean for non-medical reasons.
If you ask your midwife or doctor for a caesarean when there are not medical reasons, they'll explain the overall benefits and risks of a caesarean to you and your baby compared with a vaginal birth.
If you're anxious about giving birth, you should be offered the chance to discuss your anxiety with a healthcare professional who can offer support during your pregnancy and labour.
Luckily, I’d done my research and gone armed with the facts.
But I think a mum-to-be who wasn’t as well-informed could have been bullied into a vaginal birth she was scared of.
I was also warned I might not be able to have a second baby afterwards.
But as my husband is ten years older than I am, we knew we only wanted one.
'I felt empowered'
Being fully prepared for my planned c-section at 39 weeks meant I felt empowered in the operating theatre.
I knew who everyone was and what their jobs would be.
I think labouring mums can often feel like a piece of meat, not a person, especially when it’s an emergency situation.
I’ll admit that a c-section costs the NHS more than a vaginal delivery.
But I could have ended up with an emergency one or another intervention, not to mention longer-term health issues that needed treatment.
When I talk to other people in my industry, as well as women’s health physio, lots of them agree that the planned section is just safer.
'We bonded beautifully'
Despite the horror stories I was told, I breastfed Fox for a full year and we bonded beautifully.
I wonder if that’s because I wasn’t anxious and exhausted after a long labour?
To prepare for my delivery, I did a hypnobirthing course.
The teacher had never worked with a client undergoing an elective section before.
Now she tells me more expectant mums in my shoes are going to her.
When I train other fitness professionals, I make sure they use the term ‘vaginal’ not ‘natural’ when asking mums about their birth.
It makes me wince when I see people careless shaming women that way.
As a society, we focus so much on the method of birth, not ensuring the mum is fit and healthy afterwards.
Dads share posts about the ‘warrior’ wives who do it without even a paracetamol, like it’s a badge of honour.
Pregnancy is nine months – and raising a child is forever. Birth is a tiny part of that.
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I worked hard at having a healthy pregnancy. The ‘natural birth’ badge of honour wasn’t something I craved.
I refused to be shamed or made to feel ‘less’ for my choice.