A mum admits that she would be relieved if her youngest son died in his sleep

A MUM has admitted that she wishes her youngest child would "die in his sleep".

In a startlingly frank admission, posted and since deleted on Reddit, user ihatemythird opened up about how much she dislikes her 3-year-old son, and has wanted him dead since she first found out she was pregnant.

She explained that she and her husband already had two daughters when she found out that she was pregnant at 16 weeks - and it was too late for her to have an abortion.

In her rambling admission, she said: "I feel terrible saying this, but I found myself willing this pregnancy to have a serious problem, because that's the exception for an abortion.

"But it was healthy. I had to fake happiness getting the 'congratulations' result.

"I felt 'cornered' into having the baby because I felt we couldn't really have two babies and then 'give one away', and I didn't know how to explain it to my kids who were old enough to understand I was pregnant.

"My career probably would have been thriving if not for his birth - I am now working somewhere crap in a crappy role that I hate.

"I honestly hated him for the first 18 months of his life.

"I don't want to be insensitive to anyone who has suffered a loss in this way, but I have to be honest, my husband and I both had a period where if he had of died in his sleep, we would have felt relief.

"I sobbed. I wished more than anything I realised I was pregnant earlier and could have had the abortion I wanted."

The poster then explains that she has seen two different therapists as she struggles to deal with the presence of the little lad, who she says became a "difficult toddler and things have not improved for the family.

She added that she feels nothing towards her son except obligation, but the opposite for her older two children, who are aged 6 and 8.

She continued: "I feel like I love and care for my daughters because I genuinely love them, and I look after my son because it is my obligation to do so.

"I always wanted them. I never wanted him. I assume the love and maternal feelings would come after birth, but it never did....probably because of how difficult he was.

"If one of my daughters asks me to read a book, I genuinely want to. If he asks me to read a book, I say yes, but it feels like a chore.

"I feel like when I hug my girls and tell them I love them, I mean it, while when I do it with my son, I'm going through the motions.

"When he wants to talk to me, I'm not really interested, but I am when my daughters talk to me. When he comes and hugs me, I feel....nothing, but I feel happy and loved when my daughters do it.