This is why women AVOID sex as they get older – and the one simple exercise that can help
FROM hot flushes to night sweats and mood swings, the menopause is an inescapable fact of life for all women.
But did you know it can also cause bladder weakness AND ruin your sex life - all in one cruel swoop?
It can be an embarrassing topic to talk about, but on World Menopause Day, experts are urging women to speak up and know they're not alone in their suffering.
One in three women over 40 across the UK suffer with bladder weakness, new research shows.
And they're avoiding sex with their partner for fear they might have an accident during an intimate moment.
One in ten say bladder weakness has ruined their sex life all together, while 23 per cent say it has caused them to get down and dirty less often.
And according to Annabelle Knight, a sex and relationship expert, the impact it has on your sex life goes further than just being intimate.
Bladder weakness can have a huge impact on a woman's body confidence, making them feel embarrassed and unattractive.
Annabelle told The Sun Online: “It puts a huge strain on relationships because if you are not talking to your partner about it it can instil all sorts of worries in your partners mind as to why you’re not wanting to have sex or why you are withdrawn.
“A happy and healthy sex life is key for a relationship.
“When I say a happy and healthy sex life I don’t mean you have to be doing it 24/7, I mean you are content with the sex you're having.
“For one couple it might be three times a day for another it might be three times a year, it doesn’t matter as long as you are happy.
“And regularly sex links into a happy and healthy life, so if you are happy and healthy inside of the bedroom you will be happy and healthy outside of the bedroom.”
SEXUAL TENSION The real reason so many women don’t want sex that no one talks about
Bladder weakness can cause a women to wet herself when she orgasms.
But it isn’t just in the bedroom, a simple sneeze or a cough can also trigger it.
It is most common in women who have just had a baby and women who are approaching the menopause.
Declining levels of female sex hormones during menopause can weaken the pelvic floor muscles, making it harder for a woman to hold in a wee when she needs to go.
A woman is considered to be in menopause when they have not had a menstrual cycle for 12 months – meaning she is coming to the end of her reproductive years.
Symptoms usually start a few months or even years before periods stop, known as the perimenopause, and can persist for some time afterwards.
On average, most symptoms last around four years from your last period.
However, around one in every ten women experience them for up to 12 years, according to the NHS.
Another reason women may avoid being intimate when they go through the menopause is because it also increases their risk of vaginal dryness, which can make sex uncomfortable and even painful.
Thankfully, there are a few simple things you can do to improve your bladder control and regain your sex life.
Annabelle recommends you start by stopping and starting the flow of your pee when you go to the toilet.
“If you can do that you have isolated the pelvic floor and you are working it,” she said.
“And once you get used to that sensation you can then perform those exercises literally whenever you like – I do them in the car.”
GIRLS...LISTEN UP! This is the one exercise all women should do EVERY day to boost your sex life and fertility
She also recommends using a product called a non-invasive pelvic floor exerciser that treats bladder weakness.
It works by sending impulses through pads attached to your thighs and bum that causes contractions in the pelvic floor.
Pelvic floor exercises strengthen the muscles around the bladder, vagina or penis and back passage.
Also known as kegels, the exercises can help prevent urinary incontinence, treat prolapse and even make sex better by increasing sensitivity and boosting orgasms in women.
To strengthen your pelvic floor muscles, sit and squeeze and release 10-15 times in a row.
Don't hold your breath or tighten your tummy, bum or thigh muscles at the same time.
When you get used to the exercises, you can hold the squeezes for a few seconds - and do more reps.
The research, conducted on behalf of Innovo, asked 1,000 women about bladder weakness, menopause and their sex lives.
You can find out more about the product at
