Mum who lost 26 stone admits she was happier when she was fat as her ‘apron’ of excess skin has ‘ruined her life’
A MUM-OF-THREE who lost an incredible 26 stone has admitted she was happier when she was fat as the "apron" of excess skin she has been left with has "ruined her life".
Rachel Danton, 36, from from Clitheroe, Lancashire, thought she'd be able to have the saggy skin, which she estimates weighs a stone, removed on the NHS when she had a gastric band fitted nine years ago.
But after reaching her target weight of 11st 4lbs, she's since been told she'd have to have it done privately, costing £30,000 - which she can't afford.
Now housewife Rachel refuses to let husband John, 37, a mental health nurse, see or touch her naked - and rarely has sex because she's so self-conscious.
She said: "My excess skin is disgusting. It hangs from my arms, my inner thighs and I have a tummy ‘apron’ which droops over my lady parts.
"I’ve been told on five separate occasions that I can’t have it removed on the NHS.
"I’ve been offered therapy, I’ve seen a psychiatrists. None of it works. I’m at my wits end.
"If I had remained obese at 36 stone 8lbs, it would have killed me. But when I see how I look today and how I’m supposed to live - I’m in despair.
"I sometimes wonder whether it was a good idea at all."
To cope with what her body looks like without clothes, Rachel takes anti-depressants and has undergone Cognitive Behavioural therapy.
She even feels self-conscious in front of her kids - Jack, 12, Max, eight, and Amy, four.
"Today my body looks like that of a 90 year old, not a wife and mum who should be happy with her lot at 36," said Rachel.
Throughout her teens Rachel would yo-yo diet. But it was in her twenties when she started to gain weight – thanks to what she refers to as "binge eating".
She admitted: "Even though I was always big, I’m not one of those women who needs to eat round the clock.
"I wouldn’t be interested in having anything at breakfast or lunchtime. It was around 3pm I’d start to get hungry.
"I’d make myself a bacon butty and while eating it, I would think about what else I could have.
"I would pop a few slices of toast under the grill and before I knew it I would have polished off an entire loaf of bread. I’d go through 24 bags of crisps a day.
"Night-time was my weakness - that’s when I’d order in a take away. I loved curries. I’d wash everything down with full-fat coke."
It was after the birth of her sons - Jack, when she was 23, and Max four years later - that Rachel realised she needed to take drastic action.
She explained: "During each pregnancy I’d lose my appetite, but then it would come back with a vengeance after I’d given birth. I’d put on even more weight.
"I knew I was killing myself - I was eating myself to death.
"I wanted more kids, I wanted to be healthy. I didn’t have cholesterol issues, high blood pressure and I wasn’t at risk of diabetes either.
"The only health problem I had was a bad back. Even so I knew I couldn’t risk getting any bigger.
"While I was happy in my own skin, I hated that Jack had to listen to kids at school snigger about my weight.
"While I’d laugh it off to him, it did hurt and I didn’t want him bullied about what I looked like either."
In 2008 she had the band fitted - and was warned about the possibility of being left with saggy skin after such extreme weight loss.
But Rachel was also reassured by all of the medics she saw, who underlined the fact that the excess skin could be removed on the NHS.
Yet now, almost a decade on and with tighter guidelines in place, this is no longer the case.
Despite having slimmed from a size 34 to a size 10, Rachel refuses to go out unless she wears full length slimming knickers which go from beneath her boobs down to her thighs.
She fantasises about what her body would look like if she had the excess skin removed.
"I wrap myself up in Clingfilm and can see how fantastic I look without the skin hanging down everywhere," Rachel admitted.
"To make matters worse, I can see it’s getting droopier and saggier too.
"The latest psychiatrist told me my problems won’t go when the skin is removed. Of course they will!
"When I feel great about myself, I’ll be able to make love again, go swimming with my kids and go to the gym."
MOST READ IN FABULOUS
Rachel has totted up how much it would cost for a boob job to fill out her "empty sacs" and remove the excess skin on her tummy, thighs and arms - and it's in the region of £30,000.
"That's completely out of my price limit," she said.
"My life is ruined. Friends think I’m daft believing this, reminding me how healthy I now am and how fabulous I look – but all I see and feel is the excess flab.
"It’s changed me as a person too. Before I was outgoing and bubbly, now I’m introverted, a worrier and completely self-conscious of how I look."
Earlier this year we revealed Lisa Riley had more than a stone of saggy skin surgically removed after losing 12 stone.
And in June we told how a woman left with a six-pack of saggy skin after losing 12 stone revealed her total body transformation after a life-changing surgery.