Avoid making the most wonderful time of the year the most stressful time
Expert advice on how to feel festive without feeling anxious or overwhelmed
DO you feel more frazzled than festive at this time of year? According to research by mental health charity Mind, 28 per cent of us feel the pressure to have the perfect Christmas, with one in ten feeling unable to cope. Here, CLAIRE DUNWELL gets expert advice on avoiding burn-out.
Family invasion
CHRISTMAS is about spending time with loved ones, but a constant stream of visitors could have you reaching for the sherry.
Psychologist Dr Pam Spurr says: “Now’s the time to send round a cheery email setting out specific dates your are having family over.
“If people show up unannounced, offer a cuppa in the kitchen and nothing else. If you’re in the middle of something like wrapping gifts, just carry on working. This gives them the message they can’t stay long.
“If you’re hosting Christmas Day, email a fun invite specifying set times, including ‘going home’.
“When thoughts of time with a certain relation get your heart pounding, remember it’s only one day a year. Make this your mantra – I CAN get through this.”
Festive finances
FESTIVITIES put a big strain on the bank balance. There are gifts to find, nativity costumes to buy and parties galore, but you do not have to wake up in January with a hangover of debt.
Financial expert Rob Kelly says: “Try not to leave Christmas shopping until the last minute, as you are likely to spend more.
“Make nativity costumes yourself because material is cheap to buy, and get the kids involved. Pick and choose which parties to go to, and look around for local offers at venues so you get the best price.
“If you’re having people round for dinner, ask them to bring something to save money.
“If everyone chips in to help, you won’t be stressed out slaving away in the kitchen all day."
Social calendar
IT is party-dress season but if you’ve said yes to every invite and feel run down, it could be time to swap your stilettos for slippers.
Psychologist Dr Pam Spurr says: “When you feel you can’t face another party, there’s nothing wrong with backing out politely. Don’t make an outlandish excuse, just let the hosts know you can’t keep up the pace.
“Tell them you’d love to buy them drinks in January when everyone wants a bit of a lift. At parties, pace yourself by alternating alcoholic drinks with non- alcoholic, and don’t be first to arrive and last to leave.
“Have a healthy snack before going out and grab those nibbles when they come around.
“Take a stress-busting, health-boosting 15-minute brisk walk each day if you can’t make the gym.”
Wish lists
WITH endless Christmas to-do lists, trying to keep the whole family happy can leave you feeling stressed as you endlessly scroll through websites or pound the high street shopping.
Financial expert Rob Kelly says: “Don’t put pressure on yourself to find the perfect present.
“Make it a rule that you only buy for children and close family, rather than buying gifts for everyone.
“Secret Santa is a great idea as it means committing to just one present, within a set budget.
“It saves time and money – and usually results in lots of laughs. Ask family members to fill an online shop wish list with things they would like.
“Then they’re guaranteed to get something they want. Gift vouchers are perfect if you’re short of time.”
Giddy kids
THE kids cannot wait until Santa arrives, but sugary treats and late nights can result in them bouncing off the walls while you are left feeling frazzled.
Parenting expert Sue Atkins says: “Christmas is a time to build memories, so don’t descend into nagging and moaning at this magical time of year.
“It helps to be clear about what is and what is not acceptable. Jot down rules so you are clear with all the sugar, late nights and frivolities.
“Be flexible around bedtimes but be clear about how many sweets are acceptable. And make sure your partner and the grandparents are all singing from the same festive hymn sheet to avoid fallouts.
“Plan downtime to rest, relax and chill out. Keep it simple and enjoy your special time with the kids.”
Sleepless nights
WILL that enormous turkey fit in the oven? Did I remember to send an invite to great aunt Molly? Your head is swimming day and night.
Sleep practitioner Lisa Artis from the Sleep Council says: “The run-up to Christmas can be stressful so give both mind and body time to wind down by having a warm bath, listening to quiet music or doing yoga.
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“While you don’t want to miss out on all the fun, if you are not getting as much rest as you need you will soon start to feel it.
“Don’t over-indulge on turkey, mince pies and mulled wine. Too much food or alcohol, especially late at night, can play havoc with sleep patterns.
“If you can’t sleep, don’t lie there worrying about it. Get up and do something relaxing until you’re sleepy.”