Do it badly and forgive yourself… 4 ways to beat anxiety and become mentally strong
ANYONE who suffers from anxiety will tell you it is crippling and can take over your life.
And you can try just about anything to control it but it just keeps coming back.
Anxiety is a normal feeling, also known as the "fight or flight" response.
When presented with stress or danger, the body pumps adrenalin through to body - allowing it to cope with the situation at hand.
However, anxiety can become a problem when this response occurs unnecessarily - either because the danger is not that severe, or there isn't actually any danger at all.
Anxiety disorders can develop as a result of a number of factors, including stress, genetics and childhood environment.
Luckily, there are some things you can do to manage the condition and even beat it for good, Olivia Remes, a PhD candidate at the University of Cambridge, writes for
"It can appear out of the blue as a panic attack, when sudden spikes of anxiety make you feel like you’re about to have a heart attack, go mad or lose control," she said.
"Or it can be present all the time, as in generalised anxiety disorder, when diffuse and pervasive worry consumes you and you look to the future with dread.
"Most people experience it at some point, but if anxiety starts interfering with your life, sleep, ability to form relationships, or productivity at work or school, you might have an anxiety disorder.
"Research shows that if it’s left untreated, anxiety can lead to depression, early death and suicide.
"And while it can indeed lead to such serious health consequences, the medication that is prescribed to treat anxiety doesn’t often work in the long-term.
"Symptoms often return and you’re back where you started."
So how can you beat anxiety and become mentally strong?
1. Do it badly
This may seem a little strange, but if your anxiety means you find it hard to make decisions or start a new project then do it but do it badly.
The theory is based on something writer and poet GK Chesterton said: "Anything worth doing is worth doing badly."
"The reason this works so well is that it speeds up your decision-making process and catapults you straight into action," Olivia said.
"Otherwise, you could spend hours deciding how you should do something or what you should do, which can be very time-consuming and stressful.
"People often want to do something “perfectly” or to wait for the “perfect time” before starting.
"But this can lead to procrastination, long delays or even prevent us from doing it at all. And that causes stress – and anxiety.
"Instead, why not just start by 'doing it badly' and without worrying about how it’s going to turn out.
"More often than not, you’ll also discover that you’re not doing it that badly after all – even if you are, you can always fine tune it later."
2. Be kind to yourself
Try not to be critical of yourself or the mistakes you make.
If you had a friend that did that to you then you'd want them out of your life pretty quickly, so why should anxiety be able to do the same?
"People with anxiety often do this to themselves so frequently that they don’t even realise it anymore. They’re just not kind to themselves," writes Olivia.
"So perhaps it’s time to change and start forgiving ourselves for the mistakes we make.
"If you feel like you’ve embarrassed yourself in a situation, don’t criticise yourself – simply realise that you have this impulse to blame yourself, then drop the negative thought and redirect your attention back to the task at hand or whatever you were doing."
3. Wait to worry
This essentially means; don't panic straight away.
"If something went wrong and you feel compelled to worry (because you think you screwed up), don’t do this immediately," Olivia said.
"Instead, postpone your worry – set aside 10 minutes each day during which you can worry about anything.
"If you do this, you’ll find that you won’t perceive the situation which triggered the initial anxiety to be as bothersome or worrisome when you come back to it later.
"And our thoughts actually decay very quickly if we don’t feed them with energy."
4. Help others
Try spending more of your day with someone else in mind.
If you spend very little of your day thinking about others then you are at risk of poor mental health.
"Regardless of how much we work or the amount of money we make, we can’t be truly happy until we know that someone else needs us and depends on our productivity or love," Olivia explained.
"This doesn’t mean that we need people’s praise, but doing something with someone else in mind takes the spotlight off of us (and our anxieties and worries) and places it onto others – and how we can make a difference to them."
Being connected to people has regularly been proven as a way to ward of mental health problems.
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"Knowing that someone else needs you makes it easier to endure the toughest times," Olivia added.
"You’ll know the 'why' for your existence and will be able to bear almost any 'how'.
"So how can you make yourself important in someone else’s life?
"It could be as simple as taking care of a child or elderly parent, volunteering, or finishing work that might benefit future generations.
"Even if these people never realise what you’ve done for them, it doesn’t matter because you will know. And this will make you realise the uniqueness and importance of your life."
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