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MAID THE RIGHT DECISION

Here’s why Meghan is a genius for not having a maid of honour (and YOU probably shouldn’t either)

The unconventional move gets the backing of Cosmopolitan editor Farrah Storr

THIS week it was announced that Meghan Markle would have no maid of honour when she walks down the aisle to marry Prince Harry on May 19.

Farrah Storr, Editor of Cosmopolitan magazine, made the same "liberating" choice when she tied the knot - and says it was the best decision of the whole wedding.

 Prince Harry and Meghan Markle at Kensington Palace after their engagement was announced
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Prince Harry and Meghan Markle at Kensington Palace after their engagement was announcedCredit: News Group Newspapers Ltd

When I was growing up the only thing I remember about the Royal Family was the fact that Prince Harry used to stuff his dad’s slippers down the toilet.

"Brilliant!" I remember thinking. "What a rebel! What a hoot! What a totally unconventional thing to do when you’re fifth in line to the throne.

"This boy is a GENIUS!"

Harry continued to display signs of genius throughout his adult life - namely by doing deeply unroyal things like cavorting in a Las Vegas hot tub with bunch of blondes. In fact, "blasting convention" has become something of a thing for him.

 Meghan poses with Harry after announcing the engagement in November
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Meghan poses with Harry after announcing the engagement in NovemberCredit: Handout - Getty

Which is why it shouldn’t surprise any of us that his bride-to-be is no conventional, tight-lipped thoroughbred Princess-in-waiting.

Oh no….Instead he chose Meghan Markle, a divorced, biracial daughter of a yoga teacher from America. See what I mean? A genius.

He’s clearly marrying a woman with a mind of her own, who came into it with a career, a messy romantic back history and some fairly immense modelling pictures back from that time she was a Deal or No Deal model.

And because she’s unconventional with a mind of her own she is shaking up this royal wedding.  She is handing out "golden tickets" to the ceremony so Joe Public can come along and, wait for it… she is not having a maid of honour.

The official line is that she has too many friends to choose from. But I’d say the real reason is because she’s very, very wise.

 Harry was a bit of a mischief as a boy
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Harry was a bit of a mischief as a boyCredit: Getty

I didn’t have a maid of honour and it was fantastic. Seriously. Best decision of the entire wedding in fact. By making that call I instantly liberated myself from all the politics, pandering and potential upstaging that a maid of honour can bring.

(My enduring image of Will and Kate’s wedding? Regretfully Pippa’s backside. Meghan is wise enough to swerve the mere possibility of being outshone by a pair of cantilevered ass cheeks).

Like Megan I was well into my thirties when I walked down the aisle. I was a boss. I earned my own money. I had lived a little.

Having another woman hold my dress and basically chaperone me the twenty or so yards it took to reach my husband just didn’t sit right. It felt a little, how can I say this… out of date. Even the word "maid" with its whisper of quivering subservience ("best woman" I’d have less of an issue with) just didn’t sit easy with me.

 Harry and Meghan, pictured at Eikon Northern Ireland last month
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Harry and Meghan, pictured at Eikon Northern Ireland last monthCredit: News Group Newspapers Ltd

And then of course there was the politics. First…who to pick? Do you go for family? (Too much of a cop out), your oldest childhood friend (too risky - people’s tastes, habits and understanding of you have changed a lot since kindergarten) or maybe your cool, new friend who, let’s be honest, you probably have the most in common with and who you just know will throw you the best hen (but this choice will get everyone’s back up).

And then of course you have to decide whether you want to sacrifice your relationship with this person for the rest of your days, because being the MOH is a big deal. It will require a whole new Whatsapp group - a group that will soon come to fill her life with dread and misery as one hen after another will experience their own existential crisis in less than fifty words. Every day.

 Editor of Cosmopolitan Farrah Storr
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Editor of Cosmopolitan Farrah StorrCredit: Getty - Contributor

She will spend months on Groupon looking for spa trips away that no one will end up paying her for. She will spend her evenings looking for penis straws and getting T-shirts printed up by some man living in a hut she found on Etsy who says he can’t fit the bride’s name on a pink crop top so she’ll have to settle for a slightly misspelt version instead. She will cry alone at night. And vow that when she gets married she will never ever put anyone through this.

And so, like I said, Meghan is too smart for a maid of honour. She wants to keep her friends, not lose them. She wants to be the focal point on May 19th not the woman who was outshone by her MOH. (Because whether we like it or not people will compare. It’s unfair and it’s mean spirited but we’re hard-wired to do that stuff). She wants to show that she is a strong, smart princess who needs only another strong, smart woman by her side (namely her mum). It will rattle royal convention to its frigid core. And really, that’s what we’ve all been waiting for.

Farrah Storr is the Editor-in-chief of Cosmopolitan. Instagram

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