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STOP IT, NOW!
Stacey Solomon: Calling me cheap and desperate for being proud of my body is dangerous… and fans are sick of YOU, not me
SO yesterday I lost the ability to allow horrible, hate-fuelled comments to fly over my head.
Although I wish I could have ignored the comments, I don’t regret calling out the behaviour of a publication that I refuse to name again so as not to give them one more ounce of publicity that they may thrive off, no matter how negative.
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As I looked at myself on the front of the glossy magazine, I was unable to un-see the enormous bold letters that said: “Desperate, boring and cheap,” followed by, “and why fans are sick of her”.
On another page they’re claiming fans are fed up of a woman (me) posing in pictures without airbrushing and saying she’s proud of her body and doesn’t fuss about body hair - all things I wrote about in my recent columns.
I know many people will say these kinds of remarks are part and parcel of the industry I am in and I should just ignore it.
Most of the time I am able to adopt this mentality, and I work hard to look after my inner self in order to do so.
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However there is no denying, despite what some people may believe about people in the public eye, I am a human being. I know, who’d have thought it, eh? I’m not a robot.
Sometimes it is impossible not to let the horrible stuff in. I can’t bat it away all of the time.
It’s one thing having online trolls saying these things to their maybe five followers and another for a national magazine to put it on their front page to sit on the shelves of newsagents, supermarkets and waiting rooms across the country and anywhere else they wind up.
After the initial punch in the gut I took a look inside, which made me feel even more sick than I already felt.
The heavier reality set in. And it’s sinister.
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Stacey Solomon tells how she hasn't had to shave her body hair in refreshingly honest holiday video
These types of publication are telling their audience things like the only way to feel happy after a relationship breakdown is to get a “revenge body”.
It’s telling people that the most important thing, the thing that will change everything, the thing that, in a round-about way is responsible for everything going wrong in your life, is your BODY.
FYI publication that shall not be named, there is no such thing as a revenge body, as was so rightfully pointed out by the wonderful Nicola Thorpe yesterday.
This negative, passive-aggressive article goes go hand in hand with the horrific reports we’ve seen recently regarding mental health, in particular those associated with self-esteem and feeling inadequate.
A quarter of 14-year-old girls are self-harming. I started working with Childline and the NSPCC last year, who have reported an influx in calls from distressed young people who, thanks to these kind of articles and social media, feel obliged to look and be a certain way.
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Magazine's cover is 'the meanest thing I've ever seen' says Stacey...
Inside the magazine, the article took aim at topics Stacey has written about in her Fabulous columns, including her decision to embrace her pubic hair.
It included nasty comments from "fans", with one apparently calling her "cheap and common" for sharing her love of her lady garden, although didn't indicate where their gripes came from.
Now! Magazine also commented on Stacey's decision to take her eldest son Zachary, 10, to a police station when he was misbehaving.
In her Fabulous column, Stacey admitted she'd got to a point where she "didn’t even recognise my own child", which led her to shop him to the cops.
Now! claimed one person had written in response: "You really are making yourself look a fool here Stacey with all your remarks, surely these matters should be kept private."
The mag also called out Stacey's inspirational pictures online, including her most recent snap of herself in a bikini where she embraced her "extra tummy lines".
Stacey, who is known to be firmly against airbrushing, was widely praised by fans for baring her own natural stomach, with many calling her ";a role model" and a "real woman" for embracing her curves.
I will continue to do whatever I can to push these incredible charities to the forefront of the conversation because, quite frankly, they’re the people mopping up the mess these irresponsible outlets have left behind.
To add some balance to this piece, after hours of me asking the magazine why they felt the need to write what they did - and thousands asking the same - there was no comment or word from the publication, until ITV news decided to run the story.
Then it provided a statement: “The story featured in this week’s issue regarding Stacey Solomon was written on the basis of social media comments about Stacey and is not the opinion of *** Magazine.
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“As a publication, we simply aim to inspire debate amongst our readers about their favourite celebrities and TV stars, including Stacey.
"We do not encourage or condone bullying in any form. We apologise to Stacey for any distress our story may have caused.”
Unsatisfied doesn’t even cover a smidgen of how this makes me feel. Let me count the ways.
1. Adding quote marks to words doesn’t make them any less cutting. It also doesn’t wash your hands of any responsibility for how they make the person feel. Also “and why fans are sick of her” isn’t in quotes, so let’s not pretend they’re someone else’s words. They’re yours, OWN IT.
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2. I don’t doubt that the quotes from social media users you’ve used to tear me down are real. But some perspective would be nice. On the pictures in question there were 3,600 comments, the majority of which were empowering and positive.
3. To "inspire debate". A debate can only be a debate if you have balance. There is no balance here. It’s all negative - there isn’t one “on the other hand” or “others said”.
Stacey Solomon demonstrates the true meaning of body positivity
4. If I printed thousands of copies of a picture of someone, quoting horrible things in giant letters next to it, would I be branded a bully? Too right.
5. Don’t apologise to me. Apologise to all of the people affected by this. All of the people who feel they aren’t good enough. All of the people who are being conditioned by the “normalising” of this. All of the women who’ve been splashed on your cover next to vile, disgusting words in an attempt to make money, while dragging them into the ground.
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The best thing to come out of this is that the majority of people are sick of what they're seeing and support change and empowerment.
It's so overwhelming and comforting to hear the positive messages from people and receive the flood of support.
They've restored my faith in humanity and prove it's OK to be yourself and be happy.
MOST READ IN FABULOUS
Stacey Solomon reveals how she took one of her sons to a police station after his behaviour got out of control
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