From tweets to tags, here’s a list of social media no-no’s if your relationship is on the rocks
Breaking up is hard to do at the best of times, but it will help ease the pain if you pay attention to social media, who's tagging you in a post and what not to post
NAVIGATING social media is tricky at the best of times – but even more so if you are going through a bitter break-up.
Katie Spooner, partner at London law firm Winckworth Sherwood, gives CLAIRE DUNWELL a list of social media guidelines if your relationship is on the rocks.
Money matters
If you are coming out of a marriage with divorce proceedings pending, and posting photos of yourself with a fabulous new car or on a lavish holiday, be cautious.
Think about whether this is going to make the legal process more difficult.
There may be financial matters you need to sort.
If there is a different story being told through social media, it is going to cause problems.
Make sure whatever you are portraying on your profile matches real life.
Tread carefully
During a relationship breakdown – and particularly afterwards – one party is usually way ahead of the other.
If you are the one who is out having a good time, it only takes one photo of you with someone else to create a lot of tension and make things more difficult.
You have no control over what others are posting, so be very careful.
Check security settings to see if friends can tag you in their posts.
Protect yourself
Going through the final weeks of a break-up when things can be bitter?
Is there anything on social media which you don’t want them to see?
Make sure you are logging out of your accounts and your devices are not linked.
If you are in the office and messages are pinging up on your tablet on the coffee table at home, who might be reading them?
Often, people know each other’s passwords, so if you are coming to the end of a relationship it might be time to change them.
Family first
Be very wary of what your children see in your posts on social media.
They are usually logged on more than we are.
If you are in a new relationship, be careful posting photos, especially if a legal agreement has been put in place on how you are going to introduce new partners.
Similarly, if it is early days and you are on holiday posting photos of the kids with your new partner, be sensitive about how that is being perceived by your ex.
You have still got to share parental duties, so showing a bit of sensitivity about what you are posting is a good idea.
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Unplug
Remember that social media is not real life.
Taking a step away completely is a healthy thing to do, especially if you are coming out of a relationship.
If you are going through a painful divorce and waiting for settlements to come through, it is not going to help emotionally if you keep trudging through your ex-partner’s Facebook.
It can pull on emotions that make it difficult to focus on what needs to be sorted out. You need a practical head.