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Partner insists the house has to be clean and his meal ready

Dear Deidre

I AM fed up with my partner thinking he should not have to do anything in the house.

We have two sons aged three and 18 months.

My partner is 26 and he works long hours but when he gets home I work an evening shift as a carer.

I am 24.

I do everything – all the washing, cleaning and cooking.

He does nothing but insists that the children have to be fed and in bed when he gets home, the house has to be clean and his meal ready.

Then in bed he wants sex.

I never feel like it, because I am exhausted, but I am worried he will get it elsewhere.

DEIDRE SAYS: His attitude sounds 100 years out of date.

He could at least put the children to bed.

Tell him you’d have more energy for sex if he did more of the work at home.

Make a list of what has to be done and ask him to pick the jobs he will take on.

My e-leaflet Standing Up For Yourself will help you.

Why should I bother with you daughter?

Dear Deidre

MY partner has blown the family apart and I feel betrayed.

We have a three-year-old daughter together and I have a daughter, 16, who lives with my ex-wife.

She was working hard for her GCSEs this year and it’s meant she hasn’t seen much of our three-year-old, which annoys my partner.

I am 38, she is 37.

I worked hard to build bridges and it seemed better.

Then my older daughter got her Duke of Edinburgh’s Award.

Everyone congratulated her but my partner refused.

She said: “She doesn’t bother with our daughter, so why should I bother with her?”

It’s caused a lot of hurt and anger.

DEIDRE SAYS: She is reacting as if your older daughter is a love rival.

Help them get closer.

Organise for your 16-year-old to take her little sister for a fun outing and babysit while your partner takes your eldest out for a girlie day as a post-exam treat.