Comment
JEREMY CLARKSON
Donald Trump’s conviction shows we’re living in a news jungle… & we have no easy way of knowing what to believe
Social media commentary on Donald Trump has been totally split, leaving those in the middle with nowhere to turn
IN the olden days, there was the occasional miscarriage of justice, and someone was sent to prison for a crime they had not committed.
But by and large, the system was pretty foolproof.
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The police were fastidious. The court procedure was robust. And juries usually got it right.
But this week, Donald Trump was found guilty of fraud on 34 charges of falsifying business records to pay off a porn star.
It’s a done deal. It’s clear cut. Or is it?
Those who like Donald Trump say that he’s the sort of chap who saves injured rabbits and that the charges were political and brought by Joe Biden after he’d slighted overdosed on his special strengthening medicine.
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And then you have Robert De Niro, who seems to spend most of his time these days on the street, shouting at passers-by about how Donald is the most evil man ever to walk the earth.
And here we are, not knowing what’s going on. Are the courts in America now political? Who knows?
Newspapers used to be where we went for clear guidance, and I still read them avidly.
But I am also on social media, where everyone with vocal cords is given an equal chance to express his or her, or their, views.
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No matter how bonkers those views might be.
So you get half of them saying Trump is guilty and half saying he isn’t.
Donald Trump Jr blasts dad's guilty verdict & says it's Dems attempt to 'turn America into a third-world country'
In the same way that you get people supporting Ukraine and people saying Putin may have a point. Who’s right?
One thing I do know is that Instagram influencers face being cancelled if they don’t show unerring support for Palestine.
Tolerance of Israel is not permitted.
The result is that we are living in a news jungle, and we have no easy way of knowing what to believe. Which brings me on to the BBC.
Playmobil hair
That used to be the go-to solution but now it’s too busy decrying capitalism on Doctor Who to notice that its news agenda is as far to the left as GB News is to the right.
And we saw the BBC’s colours this week when, after Nigel Farage had quoted the Polish prime minister in a speech about immigration, the news anchor said: “Nigel Farage with his customary inflammatory language there.”
All of which brings me on to the forthcoming General Election in Britain and the character of the man likely to be our next Prime Minister.
Some say he’s basically Tony Blair with Playmobil hair and that his Corbyn years were an aberration.
While others maintain he’s Stalin. I’d love to ask him directly, but I fear that he’s getting opinions from all the same places that we are.
So he wouldn’t have a clue either.
Fest in 'Lotte bother
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EVERY so often pompous book people stage literary festivals in various agreeable towns around Britain so that left-wing people can come to broadcast their champagne socialism views on why cricket is racist to left-wing champagne socialists in the audience.
To pay for all the champagne, and the train fares for all the woolly-headed people needed to drink it, the organisers have had a long- standing sponsorship arrangement with a highly respected wealth management company called Baillie Gifford.
But this year, the singer Charlotte Church decided that Baillie Gifford may have some of its clients’ money invested in Israel.
So now it’s been forced to withdraw its sponsorship.
Organisers will have to find a company with deep pockets as a replacement, which may be tricky if they are now not allowed to have any dealings in any activity Ms Church finds distasteful.
No oil, war, meat, Israel, Russia, Trump, global warming, chemicals, pharmaceutical drugs, or Tories. Good luck with that.
Davey looks sunk
BRITAIN’S army of Liberal Democrats plainly had a meeting back in February and decided that if Mr Sunak was to call a summer election, their leader, a man called Sir Davey, should campaign while wearing nothing but swimming trunks.
They then left the phone box, pleased with the idea because what would be better than having their man in the summer sunshine, at a water park and then on a paddle board. It’d all be happy and jolly.
Ha! It hasn’t stopped raining since the election was called and it is extremely cold.
And when we see Sir Davey whizzing down a water slide, we are all forced to ask: “Why’s that silly man doing that?”
HILARIOUS news from the war on global warming because it turns out that a plan to make cargo ships more environmentally friendly has backfired.
Four years ago, various eco-mentals decided that the amount of sulphur in the fuel used by big ships should be dramatically reduced.
But there’s been a problem because, when sulphur is burned, you get little airborne particles which reflect sunlight back into space.
And these particles also cause clouds to form.
If you’re not burning sulphur, the sunlight reaches the earth’s surface more easily and you get more global warming.
Is that Nat in drag?
I WAS truly amazed this week to see a photograph of Natalie Portman outside a pub in London, smoking.
There was a time when everyone I knew smoked. And now everyone I know, except Lisa, doesn’t.
I thought it had become like mead, something no-one does any more.
Diane good laugh
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THANKFULLY, the Labour Party has seen sense and allowed Diane Abbott to be a candidate, which means we’re not in danger of losing one of Parliament’s last great characters.
She couldn’t add up. She never really knew what she was talking about.
She went out once in two unmatching left shoes and she dated Jeremy Corbyn.
She was a bit like John Prescott really. Apart from the dating Jeremy Corbyn thing. Endlessly entertaining.
Really, though, after the way Labour gave her the runaround, she should stand as an independent because as an independent she can’t do anything. Except amuse us.
And I am sure the people of Hackney would vote her in.
Especially if, like Natalie, you’re American and wholesome and a Harvard-educated mother of two.
Finding out that she does is like finding out that Bernard Matthews was a paid up member of the RSPB.
You can't beat American war films
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MY son and I greatly enjoy watching American war films, where one man, against the odds, rushes about, shooting everything that moves while rolling down a bank in a jungle.
12 Strong, above, was brilliant. Chris Hemsworth charged at a tank while on a horse and even though he was shooting from the hip, he was still able to duck out of the way of the shells that had been fired at him.
And now comes a movie called Land Of Bad. It is fantastically preposterous.
All the baddies are Russian and Arab terrorists. No one’s done much historical research, I think.
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Anyway, one man has to take them all out, which he does because of a simple Hollywood rule: it takes one round from an air pistol to blow a baddie’s head off.
But to kill an American soldier, you need 5,000 men, six tanks, a helicopter gunship and a squadron of MiGs. And even then he’ll survive.
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