I feel f****** terrible because I’ve never given blood and now I need it! I’m forever grateful to that selfless stranger

CANCER doesn't like whiskey, or holidays.

It's not that fond of festivals either, it turns out.

My diseased body isn't so good at fighting off infections as it was, once upon a healthier time.

After my little overnight stay at a French hospital on my hols, I was hell-bent on telling the infection (and my stage 4 bowel cancer) to "do one".

The plan was to be healthy and fighting fit after time in the sun, ready to face my next batch of "nuclear-grade", hardcore chemo head on.

But like a nasty smell, the bug wouldn't shift.

My pre-chemo bloods showed my infection had read the #c*ckoffcancer memo, but blindly ignored it.

Then came the guilt.

Full admission...after getting home from sunny France, I may may have pushed my body a bit too far.

It was one night, just one, but spending it in a freezing cold tent, medicating with wine and paracetamol, covered in lots of glitter at Wilderness festival probably wasn't what the doctor ordered!

So instead of chemo, I was told I would need a blood transfusion.

Freaking out aside – I suddenly was hit by a tidal wave of guilt, guilt at never having given blood myself, before all this!

I had no idea, but it's a common part of the chemo game.

Chemo isn't clever enough to work out which cells to destroy, and which to leave alone.

So it often zaps the good along with the bad.

There and then, once they matched my blood type, I was presented with the bag of my new blood.

Blood that was once inside another person.

And, to be honest with you, I vomited a little bit in my mouth.

I have a pretty strong stomach for anything medical nowadays, and yet I was a little freaked by the process – apparently this is very common!

Freaking aside - I suddenly was hit by a tidal wave of guilt, guilt at never having given blood myself, before all this!

Here I was, willingly accepting and desperately needing some blood (which sick in mouth aside), boy was I grateful for.

THINGS CANCER MADE ME SAY Cancer doesn't care that you want to go on holiday, it comes with you - and haunts you in paradise

As this new blood made its way into me, I started thinking about who had so kindly given me this priceless gift and I wanted to be able to say thank you.

I was blown away and humbled that someone so selflessly had taken their time to donate.

And by doing so they were helping me to live.