BUZZ OFF
From hoover cleaners to door stops, you won’t believe what else this sexpert says you can do with sex toys – and why you’ll never look at a napkin ring the same way again
SHORT of a cocktail stirrer? Hoover clogged? Feeling bunged up with a cold?
As gross as it sounds, this sex expert claims that you should look no further than your sex toy drawer for the perfect solution.
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As Madonna reveals she uses a vibrating sex toy on her face to slow down the ageing process, sex and relationships guru Lianne Young says the uses don't stop there.
“There are so many alternative uses for these wonderful gadgets," she tells Sun Online.
"The variety of sex toys is simply enormous - the only limit is your imagination.”
Lianne says you can re-purpose many items to serve as everything from cocktail stirrers to iPad holders.
Here she reveals the bonkers uses for the contents of her naughty drawer...
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Vibrator as a smoothie maker and sinus unblocker
Thanks to advances in the sex toy industry, most toys are now made from safe materials like latex, meaning they are designed to be suitably inserted into all sorts of places... like a smoothie, for example.
These beauties range from the simple G-spot vibrator, allowing you hours of passion from a tiny hand-held device, to the famous Rampant Rabbit and beyond.
So, it has all the power and features you need to mix the perfect protein shake, process your soup or whip up a morning smoothie.
The ZALO "Queen" of sex toys - one of the top vibrators on the market - has more speed settings than your bog standard blender, and is perfect for shaking up cocktails, too.
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I took the Queen vibrator to my local gin bar and convinced the waiters to let me give it a try, and it resulted in the perfect taste.
It won't be long before bartenders around the globe will be seen using vibrators to mix your drinks.
Outside the kitchen, vibrators satisfy many therapeutic needs.
They are a perfect tool to give or receive a body massage, and to loosen up those knots caused by tension and stress in the muscles.
They are also a great help to clear your congested sinuses. Simply run your vibrator along your cheekbones to loosen the built up mucus and open the sinuses.
Butt plugs for doorstops and wine tops
The range of suction dildos is massive and I believe that their gripping power makes them a must-have household item - and not for reasons you might think.
For one, anal butt plugs are perfect substitutes for a door stop to prevent them banging open and damaging your walls.
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They are also useful as wine bottle stoppers - though you might need to polish off a decent amount of it before letting such a thing happen.
Elsewhere in the home, they serve as stylish bath plugs.
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Suction dildos make the perfect loo roll holder
I'm a fan of using dildos as toilet or kitchen paper roll holders. They stick firmly to virtually any flat service.
They can even be stuck to doors to use as bag holders, too.
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The static sex toys are also great to lean your electronic devices such as iPads or tablets against - making them easier to hold and avoid wearing out your wrist, thus saving it for more pleasurable tasks.
Perhaps most astonishingly, suction dildos can even be used to pull out dents in cars - simply press the suction part of the toy hard on the dent and pull it off.
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Longer vibrators are the perfect massage tool
Size may not matter in the bedroom, but as a massage tool, more lengthy vibrators can be used to roll over tight muscles after a stressful day.
Alternatively, if you work out a lot, they’re perfect for soothing leg muscles by running width ways up and down your limbs.
They are also perfect ergonomic devices to rest your arms on whilst typing at your keyboard, thereby avoiding repetitive strain injuries – although it may not be everyone's first choice of office stationery.
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C**k rings as pen holders and napkin rings
These little devices, which are even sold in Poundshop, are the absolute king for maintaining and improving an erection. They are also one of the most useful tools around the house.
The handy sex aids are terrific for controlling all those messy cables around your work space. Simply squeeze the cables together through the cock ring.
They also make unique napkin rings, adding a little more excitement to a dinner party.
What's more, they also make nifty key rings, as well as stationery desk tidies to keep you from losing your pens.
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Most read in health news
Anal love beads as hoover cleaners
The amazing sensation of inserting and removing these beads is only matched by their usefulness in recovering all kinds of things trapped inside household devices.
We all know the vacuum has powerful suction and a habit of picking up unintended objects we may value.
Why not use the love beads as an un-blocker - just pop them into the tube of the hoover and pull out to release any objects.
Honestly, with the versatility of sex toys - who needs a man around the house - let alone the bedroom?