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TONY PARSONS

Use your vote wisely and keep worthless git Jeremy Corbyn out of No10

JEREMY CORBYN is a historically unique Labour leader because he is so manifestly unfit to lead this country.

The New Statesman, a Labour-supporting magazine for all of its 106-year history, has taken the unprecedented step of declaring that this Labour leader should not be let anywhere near 10 Downing Street.

 Use your vote to keep worthless git Jeremy Corbyn out of No10, says Tony Parsons
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Use your vote to keep worthless git Jeremy Corbyn out of No10, says Tony ParsonsCredit: EPA

The New Statesman has two objections against Corbyn.

“His reluctance to apologise for the anti-Semitism in Labour and to take a stance on Brexit, the biggest issue facing the country, make him unfit to be Prime Minister,” declares its editorial.

But this is being far too easy on the Marxist muppet. Corbyn would bankrupt the nation. Corbyn despises this country. Corbyn has spent a career licking the boots of terrorists. Corbyn never met a hate preacher he didn’t like.

If Jeremy Corbyn gets elected on Thursday then, in the words of The Carpenters, it will be yesterday once more — and a return to the ravages of gormless Socialism, red in tooth and claw, unseen since the Seventies.

We have forgotten what mass unemployment is like in this country. We have forgotten what soaring inflation is like. We have forgotten what it is like to endure endless strikes. Corbyn would bring it all back — and worse.

For Jeremy Corbyn has no love for this country. He has no affection for our people, our history or our flag.

Personally, I couldn’t give a flying fig if Corbyn watches the Queen’s speech on Christmas Day.

But it does bother me that he always takes the side of this country’s enemies.

It concerns me that his “friends” include terrorists such as Hamas, Hezbollah and the IRA. It disturbs me like hell that Corbyn can even find excuses for Russian thugs conducting their murderous business on British soil.

Jeremy Corbyn despises the nation he seeks to lead. And that scares me most of all.

MARXIST MORON

Thursday will dawn cold, dark and with the possibility of snow. This close to Christmas, nobody feels like going to a polling booth. But this close to a terrorist-sympathising Marxist moron seizing power, we can’t afford NOT to vote.

There are real problems that the incoming government will need to address on day one.

Yes, our departure from the European Union is absolutely crucial. But no matter how much we may despise the unelected fat cats in Brussels, the nations of Europe will always be our neighbours and should always be our friends.

 Jeremy Corbyn despises the nation he seeks to lead
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Jeremy Corbyn despises the nation he seeks to leadCredit: AFP or licensors

Leaving the EU while maintaining good trading relations with it is no easy day at the office.

And the new PM will have far more than Brexit to deal with. The housing crisis has made owning your own home an impossible dream for the younger generation.

The pressures on our schools, roads and NHS are at breaking point. The working man and woman pay too much tax. Serious crime is rising. Climate change is real.

All this is waiting in our new Prime Minister’s inbox.

TENTH-RATE LITTLE MAN

Jeremy Corbyn — a stupid, tenth-rate little man with stale, left-wing clichés where his brain should be — is clearly not up to the job.

He is an economic cretin who would empty your pockets. He is a spineless hypocrite on Brexit. He has enabled racism to enter the bloodstream of the Labour Party. And he hates the wicked West.

“What goes around comes around,” Corbyn sneered when almost 3,000 people were murdered on 9/11.

Every time there is a terrorist attack, Corbyn finds a way of saying that we had it coming.

On Thursday, YOUR vote can keep the worthless old git and his deranged supporters from power.

This country deserves better than Jeremy Corbyn.

Jeremy Corbyn gets former Tory-voting company director to tell Twitter 'low taxation doesn't work'

Emma WHAT-son?

 The Pirelli Calendar was once the byword for lavishly shot sexiness
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The Pirelli Calendar was once the byword for lavishly shot sexinessCredit: Pirelli

THE Pirelli Calendar was once the byword for lavishly shot sexiness, but it is struggling to find its role in the modern world.

Pretentious pictures of Emma Watson as a po-faced nun are probably not the answer to the Italian firm’s dilemma.

 Pretentious pictures of Emma Watson as a po-faced nun are probably not the answer to the Italian firm’s dilemma
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Pretentious pictures of Emma Watson as a po-faced nun are probably not the answer to the Italian firm’s dilemmaCredit: Pirelli Calendar

Next year Pirelli should just print pictures of tyres.

It has to be more interesting than this pompous cobblers.

Licence to thrill returns

 If Ana de Arma is not the ultimate Bond girl, then my name is Pussy Galore
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If Ana de Arma is not the ultimate Bond girl, then my name is Pussy GaloreCredit: Splash News

HARDCORE James Bond fans have long feared that an increasingly politically correct 007 was becoming licensed to kill joy.

Bond had started coming over all woke. Daniel Craig never needs much encouragement to moan about Bond’s old-fashioned, sexist ways, while sources have claimed that the term “Bond girls” is now banned on 007 film sets as it is deemed unacceptable in the modern era.

All very worthy. And all light years away from the gritty, sexy essence of Ian Fleming’s iconic hero.

But the good news is that the trailer for the new Bond movie, No Time To Die, dropped this week and it looks exactly like a 007 blockbuster should look.

Evil villains dreaming of world domination. Fast cars and fast women. Fiendishly clever gadgets. Car chases that would get you nine points on your licence.

And if Ana de Arma is not the ultimate Bond girl, then my name is Pussy Galore.

No way, Norway!

 This year the tree in Trafalgar Square is, frankly, a bit of a disappointment
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This year the tree in Trafalgar Square is, frankly, a bit of a disappointmentCredit: PA:Press Association

WHEN I was a child, my family would make a 50-mile round trip just to gawp at the Christmas wonders of London.

The lights of the West End. Santa’s grotto in Selfridges.

And the giant Christmas tree given to us every year since 1947 by the nation of Norway, grateful to us for chasing out the Nazis.

This year the tree in Trafalgar Square is, frankly, a bit of a disappointment.

Did the Norwegians forget to water it?

That’s not a giant Christmas tree.

It’s a big twig.

I’m not sure I would go to the end of the garden to see it, let alone drive all the way from Billericay.

Kate such a tree-t

 Kate Middleton is a great ambassador for the Royal Family
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Kate Middleton is a great ambassador for the Royal FamilyCredit: Reuters

THE Duchess of Cambridge is such a great ambassador for the Royal Family.

In these difficult days, with Prince Andrew all sweaty and Prince Harry all sulky, the glorious Kate never puts a foot wrong.

Look at her helping out at a charity for disadvantaged kids on a Christmas tree farm in Great Missenden, Bucks.

Sometimes I think that, after the Queen has gone, there is no future for the monarchy in modern Britain.

But then I look at Kate – always smiling, always gracious – and I change my mind.

He's like a Nish out of water

 Bread was thrown at the comedian for trotting out lame anti-Brexit quips
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Bread was thrown at the comedian for trotting out lame anti-Brexit quips

WHEN BBC-approved comedian Nish Kumar appeared at The Lord’s Taverners Christmas Lunch he was booed off stage and narrowly dodged a bread roll.

Nish made the mistake of trotting out lame anti-Brexit quips that would have had the canned laughter turned up to ten on any BBC panel show.

This material doesn’t work so well in the real world.

The Lord’s Taverners is a cricket charity that supports children living in poverty or with disability. A very good cause.

But the audience at their Christmas beano had no appetite for jokes about evil Tories. Although jokes about evil Tories will get your contract renewed at the BBC.

Nish, the host of The Mash Report – me neither – told the audience: “I should have known this would happen when I agreed to do a set in front of people who colonised my ancestors.”

Desperate stuff, Nish.

I very much doubt if anyone at that charity lunch colonised anyone’s ancestors.

One of these BBC-approved comics should do a stand-up routine on Diane Abbott’s mathematics.

Or the Labour Party’s inability to elect a woman leader in 119 years.

This is all worthy of biting satire!

But then they would never be asked back on Mock The Week, or The Mash Report nor any of the Beeb’s dreary, joyless, biased crap.

Nish Kumar’s humiliation in the real world begs the question: Why should we all pay the BBC £154.50 a year for a licence fee when it only represents the views of some of us?

Kumar – and all of these BBC-approved comedians – should stay in Broadcasting House.

They will be safe there – Nish, Dara O Briain, Sandi Toksvig, Jo Brand and all the rest.

They should never go into the real world.

Someone might chuck a bread roll at them.

Time to bin Andy

 Is it time for Andy to go?
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Is it time for Andy to go?Credit: Getty Images - Getty

PRINCE WILLIAM says he “recycles as much as he can”.

Any chance of leaving his beleaguered uncle, the Duke of York, out for the bin men?

If Andrew is as innocent as he claims in his dealings with child-abusing billionaire Jeffrey Epstein, then he should go to the United States and do whatever it takes to clear his name.

Until he does so, the former Randy Andy is an embarrassment to his family.

And his country.

Clueless Jeremy Corbyn caught out claiming he watches Queen's Speech on Christmas Day - but doesn't know when it's on


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