From Barcelona to Naples… this Mediterranean cruise will keep the trickiest of teens happy

“I WONDER where the kids are...”

I lost count of the number of times the other half and I said that to each other as we sailed the Mediterranean on board the Norwegian Epic.

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Pinning down teenagers on a ship this size was always going to be tricky.

It was the Easter holidays and of the 4,100 passengers on board, a good third were under the age of 18.

We’d barely unpacked before they’d disappeared, pool towels in hand, to check out the Epic Plunge ride in the ship’s Aqua Park.

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Settled with a beer by the main pool on Deck 15, we caught a glimpse of them as they hurtled down slides then got on with the serious job of checking out their fellow teens from the hot tubs.

With the sun blazing down and a good book waiting to be read, I didn’t worry much as I lay back on my lounger. They were happy and I was free to relax.

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We’ll see them at dinner, I reassured the other half as he went off to check out the Pulse gym.

By nightfall, we’d explored the ship, booked our tickets for the evening’s performance of Broadway smash-hit Priscilla, Queen of the Desert and made reservations for two special fine-dining restaurants.

It’s always a good idea to get your week planned when it comes to the big shows and restaurants.

Cruise line NCL was the first to ditch stuffy, timed dining and allows guests to eat where they want, when they want. But with 14 restaurants to choose from, some with additional charges, the choice can be overwhelming.

We plumped for Teppanyaki — it’s an extra £25 but it’s dinner and a show rolled into one, as you sit around a sizzling hot station while your dedicated chef cooks up a storm on the hotplate and keeps you entertained to boot.

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Also worth the £16 extra charge was the Moderno Churrascaria — a carnivore’s cornucopia, with endless towering skewers of beef, pork and more, carved direct to your table.

They’ll keep serving until you finally admit defeat and place the red chip on your table.

But for the first night I’d planned a family dinner in the main Manhattan restaurant — a classy affair with an Art Deco theme. The kids had different ideas.

“It’s OK, Mum. We’re meeting our friends at O’Sheehan’s for dinner then we’re going bowling. After that we’re heading to Entourage to play a little pool.” And with that, they were off.

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Entourage is the teen hangout on Deck 16. With air hockey, TVs and a video arcade below, it’s the perfect place to escape pesky parents and is open until 1am for night owls such as my two.

The hubby and I enjoyed dinner in peace — and loved Priscilla.

This West End-quality musical is a fabulously uplifting extravaganza and the 681-seat Epic Theatre would put some of our London ones to shame.

Our day at sea as we cruised from Barcelona to our first port of call in Naples was the perfect chance for us to check out the spa.

The kids were still on the missing list, although I did get a glimpse of Ben as he scaled the rock-climbing wall and Abbi’s screams were definitely audible from the bungee trampoline.

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The spa was an oasis of calm and although some of the treatments can be eye-wateringly expensive (£300 24-carat gold facial, anyone?), you can still enjoy a pampering mani or pedi from a more sensible £24.

Docking in Naples we finally got some family time, heading off to explore the fascinating tunnels under this chaotic city with their millennia of history.

Ben loved its World War Two history, Abbi was keen to explore the shops.

We settled quickly into a routine — days in port exploring as a family and nights when the kids could enjoy hanging out with their new friends and we could once more enjoy some adult time, from fantastic food to great shows.

EXPLORE DIY EXCURSIONS

OUR cruise took us from Barcelona to Naples, Civitavecchia for Rome, Livorno for Florence and Pisa as well as the French ports of Cannes and Marseille.

And we did what many savvy cruisers are doing and booked our excursions independently from our cruise line.

It often saves money and crucially, allows you to plan your own exploring at your own pace, seeing the things that interest you the most.

Online cruise giant Iglu partners up with cruisingexcursions.com to offer packages that tie up with your itinerary. And they start from a very reasonable £39 for a Rome On Your

Own excursion, £48 for a Florence Express tour and £52 for a Pompeii and Naples tour.

For our trip, it offered a great four-excursion package including a Pisa and Florence trip from Livorno, Monaco and Monte Carlo tour from Cannes, a Valldemossa, Deia and Soller tour from Palma, and a Pompeii, Sorrento and Positano view tour from Naples.

The package was from £248 per person, based on two travelling.

Or if you are travelling in a group or with family and friends, it’s also worth checking out its private tours – essentially a car and driver, sometimes with a guide, giving you the freedom to decide what you want to do and at what pace.

For more, visit or call 020 3696 9469.

After dinner, the Cavern Club provided the perfect place for a drink and live music.

A word on the drinks — they can be ruinously expensive.

Beers are relatively cheap and cocktails at happy hour are good value but £10 for a small glass of wine is not.

My tip? Look out for special booking offers including a drinks package — there was a large group on our cruise on the all-inclusive deal and we did feel rather envious of their ability to enjoy a tipple whenever, without worrying about the price.

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As we strolled through the casino I caught another fleeting glimpse of the kids — a multi-national gaggle heading for karaoke at the Bliss Lounge.

They may have been kicked out at 11pm when the venue transforms into a decent nightclub for grown-ups but they did at least get to hang out for a while first.

Our week flew by as we spent days exploring the countryside of Italy and the Cote d’Azur and nights enjoying fine food and great entertainment on board — in a very grown-up way.

For the teens, the ship was a huge hit. They had a gang of pals to chill out with at all times and the freedom to enjoy it all in a safe environment.

What more can you ask for when travelling with tricky teens!