Bachelorette Katie Thurston begs ‘get me off the stage’ as she struggles with first comedy gig before Blake Moynes split
KATIE Thurston begged "get me off this stage" as she struggled with her first comedy show before splitting with fiance Blake Moynes, The Sun can reveal.
The former Bachelorette, 30, opened for Whitney Cummings' Touch Me Tour in Anaheim, California on Friday but failed to solicit many laughs in her standup debut.
She performed a 10 minute set, referring throughout to a piece of paper with jokes written on it, according to a source in attendance.
Known for her sex positive attitude, Katie, 30, tried to deliver a raunchy set filled with jokes about sex and masturbation.
At one point she questioned: "Anyone else masturbating a lot more than they used to? While working from home?
"I'll be on a conference call for my job and no one will know I'm using a vibrator. Yeah, I masturbate on the clock where i'm getting paid for it — that's the closest I'll become to being a porn star."
The joke fell on deaf ears, however, as Katie was keenly aware of how poorly her set was being received.
She made comments including, "Oh, thanks to the one person who gets it" and continually repeated "someone please take me off this f**king stage."
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After oversharing about her masturbation habits, Katie told a few shorter jokes that elicited some giggles from the crowd - and others that did not.
It was at that point that she said: "I want to get off this stage so f**king badly right now."
An audience member, at one point, shouted back: "Please do!"
Katie continued: "This is my last story because I want off this f**king stage.";
ROYAL FLUSH
Katie closed out her set with some serious potty humor, joking about a time she "s**t herself" at a bank while on the keto diet.
She told the audience: "I run to the bathroom and pull down my dress and underwear and sure enough, it's a completely full hammock full of f**king s**t.
"A pure diaper of refried beans. It's so gross and completely everywhere and it got all over my hand.
"So I'm standing up and literally flicking my own s**t from my thong and my hand on the wall in the public restroom."
Although it appeared nothing, from masturbation to toilet troubles, was off limits, Katie did not share any jokes about fiancé Blake Moynes, who was not in attendance at the show.
'I DID IT'
However, a few days after the comedy show, the Washington native revealed she had split from the man she gave her final rose to.
The couple became engaged during the Bachelorette three-hour season finale which aired in August.
Today, Katie posted on her Instagram: "It is with mutual love and respect that we have decided to go our separate ways.
"We are so grateful for the moments we shared together and the entire journey that has unfolded this year, but we ultimately have concluded that we are not compatible as life partners, and it is the most caring choice for both of us to move forward independently.
"We ask for kindness and privacy as we both navigate this transition. Both of us will forever want the best for one another and ask you to please support us in our decision."
Blake, 30, posted the same message to his own social media account.
LONG DISTANCE LOVE
Although Blake wasn't at Katie's show, he was supporting her from afar and shared a sweet message about Katie's standup debut.
"The face you make when you realize your fiancé has bigger balls than you!" he wrote on earlier this week.
"S**t, I thought crashing a group date gave me them ... I don't think I could ever even attempt stand up comedy. Super proud and excited for you @thekatiethurston!"
Katie and Blake have been navigating long distance since they got engaged during the final episode of season 25 of The Bachelorette.
Speaking with about their unconventional romance, Katie said: "We're figuring it out.
"We don't know. This is very new to us still.
"I'm just focusing on myself, he's focusing on him, and if we work doing that, great."
When he's not in Africa for work, Blake is based in Canada. Katie is from Washington, but now lives in California. Although they're in no rush right now, Katie told Us Weekly she's excited about the pair settling down "eventually."
ROCKY ROAD
Katie has been open with fans about the challenges she and Blake have faced, many of which are beyond their control.
In August, the reality star shared in an Instagram Story video: "I don't think people fully understand what it's like to date someone from another country and the rules behind that and the visas behind that.
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"I think right now Blake can only be here for 60 days before having to go back to Canada, so we really do have a lot we have to look into — and we just haven't yet — before we can plan really anything else."
Blake arrived late on season 25 of The Bachelorette, but wound up winning Katie's heart in the end. The pair got engaged in the finale, but haven't shared any details about their impending nuptials.
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